5 Ways to Create a Positive Body Image Before Losing Weight

Statistics say that 80% of American women are dissatisfied with their appearance, and 50% of American women are on a diet at any give time. This means that a lot of women are really unhappy about what they see in the mirror. Are you one of them?

Healthy weight loss takes time. This can be frustrating, because we want quick results. But there are things you can do to love and support your body – as well as your body image – even with the extra pounds, versus waiting for a future time when you’re thinner. Here are 5 ideas:

1. Act as if you already have your ideal body. How many times do we say, “I’ll do XYZ when I lose 10 pounds?” Don’t put your life on hold waiting for someday. Wear your bathing suit, take up dance lessons, and go after the promotion – even with the extra weight. Often, we blame our bodies for not pursuing our goals – I’m too fat; I’m too old; I’m not pretty enough – when the truth is, our bodies are merely a convenient scapegoat. Yes, it takes courage to put yourself out there, but that is true whether you’re a size 2 or 22. Recognize the “wait until I lose 10 pounds game” is just a construction of your ego to keep you from acting. The circumstances will never be perfect, just as your body will never be perfect. Swallow your fear and act now.

2. Celebrate what makes you feel beautiful. What brings you joy? How do you enjoy your body? How do you feel beautiful? Integrate these things into your daily life. It’s how you live out your ideals, values and dreams.

3. Use jealousy to uncover what you want. When we’re jealous of another woman – whether it be our thin, fashionable neighbor or a thin,
fashionable movie star – it’s often because that woman speaks to something that is missing in our lives. A good question to ask ourselves is, Do we envy her body, or do we envy what her body represents? For example, I’ve admired/envied a beautiful friend in my town. Is it because she’s beautiful and has a lovely figure? No. I envied her because she has impeccable style and fabulous clothes:  something that makes me feel beautiful – yet’s been missing in my life as a work at home mom of four. I used this insight to find ways I could meet this need in my own life, instead of feeling jealous. I often get dressed up in a skirt and heels for a dinner at home…just because, or wear a killer outfit just to go buy eggs and applesauce. This small act does wonders for my body image, and my self-esteem:  because I’m living my beauty ideal rather than wishing or waiting for it.

4. Let go of celebrity comparisons. It’s easy to lose our perspective when we saturate our minds with images of celebrities and movie stars – women who make their living by their appearance – instead of “everyday” women’s bodies. Instead of looking to stars for inspiration, look to the women in your circle:  your sisters, neighbors, friends and co-workers. You’ll see that nearly every woman has cellulite; that stretch marks are common on mother’s bodies, and that a little wiggle and jiggle is normal. That being said, focus on loving your body rather than tearing down celebrities’ bodies as unrealistic or too thin. We don’t live their lives; it’s not our job to judge what they do or don’t do to look good. We get into trouble when we try and make their expectations or lifestyle or own. I don’t make my living based on my appearance. So it’s not as important to me to maintain my beauty as someone in the film industry. That’s okay:  variety is good. Let other people make different choices than you. Focus on living out what you value, and what you want, without comparing yourself to others.

5. Uncover what’s really bothering you. In her thoughtful book, Life Doesn’t Begin 5 Pounds from Now, Jessica Weiner writes about decoding the “language of fat.” When you say, “I’m fat,” what do you really mean? What’s really bothering you? For example, let’s say you’re shopping for a new outfit for a job interview, and you feel “fat” trying on clothes at the mall. Are you feeling fat, or frightened about your job interview? Likewise, if you feel “too fat” to wear a bathing suit, what’s underneath the fat? Is is fear that you won’t be accepted at your current size? Is it shame that you’ve used food for comfort and gained an extra 30 pounds? We often use our bodies or external rewards – food, alcohol, shopping, gossiping, TV – to express our feelings, instead of actively feeling or sharing them. Instead, try keeping a feelings journal. Every morning, check in with yourself? How am I feeling? Write them all down, good and bad. Let yourself feel your emotions. Pour them out, so that you don’t pour them into your body as fuel to feed the fires of self-hatred.